ROOSTER

Contributed by Terry Barger

My partner and I received a call of an ill woman at a boarding home. We boarded the squad and a short time later, arrived at what appeared to be Dr. Doolittle's Farm. There was a large number of cats, a duck, a pug dog, a hen and somewhere nearby a rooster crowed. I hate roosters! After a quick look around to assure the rooster was not in our vicinity, we grabbed our gear and headed in.
My partner gave a groan as we entered the house commenting that along with the dog he was allergic to cats. This was not where he wanted to be. With that rooster out there I wasn't all that keen on it either, but we have a job to do.
We found the owner, asked about the victim and was shown the stairs. My progress up the stairs was made difficult by the pug dog pulling at my leg. I shook it off about halfway up the stairs.
When we entered the room, we noticed at least half a dozen cats or more in the room with her. My partner gave me a quick look of "oh my gosh" as he started wheezing. We took her vitals, stabilized her and sat her in the "stair chair." By this time my partner was noticeably red in the face and having a hard time breathing. I asked if he was ok, and he replied he could make it back to the squad. I nodded and we headed down the stairs.
We never made it. Hank gave a groan and passed out near the top, leaving me to fend the chair and the lady to myself. I called for backup and informed the lady it would be a few more minutes until someone arrived to help me and to just be patient. She was quite elderly and don't think she even knew what was going on, which honestly made it a little nicer.
So, there I am, on the stairs, my partner passed out and my patient dozing off in the chair, on the stairs of Dr. Doolittle's house. I passed the time counting cats. I was nearing 60 when I heard it. The rooster. And, it wasn't outside. I started sweating and hyperventilating. I looked around and couldn't see it, but he was there.
Somewhere.
I closed my eyes and went to my "happy place" as he crowed again.
I looked back at Hank who was in a much better position than I, as was my patient who too was in a happier place, asleep. Then I saw it. A rooster feather on the stairs. No one told me roosters could climb. Around the corner he came, looking at me like I didn't belong. About the time I made up my mind to carry her down myself if need be, my backup arrived.
I gave them a very quick run down on both patients and ran like hell to the squad where I safely sat and waited for them to give my buddy a shot and see how he was.
I have faced angry patients donning knives, spoons and guns before, but never have I ever been as scared as the day I faced that rooster.

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